I’m so confused when it comes to love. I’m in love with my best friend and it hurts. I’m not ready to be in a relationship, but the rest of me wants them. I don’t know what to do. I love them so much. More than anything. I have for years. But I’m scared of losing my freedom.
He’s such a selfish b**tard. Keeps coming into my life and out again. He says he’s trying to make it work but he literally changes nothing. I met someone else. He’s kind, funny, and really beautiful. As soon as the selfish b**tard texts, he starts to come back around, but nothing has changed. I love him and thought he was the one, but I can’t keep hurting myself like this. I’ve got to get rid of him. I think about him every minute. He’s the most selfish man I’ve met. He’s also an alcoholic.
I’m sick of being in love with someone who barely notices me. I’m sick of constantly wanting the best for her and wanting to be by her side to see her succeed, only to have her look at me as someone she barely knows anymore and someone she has no intention of getting to know better. I’m sick of this love and I want a new one.
I love my man, but he has learning difficulties. It’s really frustrating sometimes when he doesn’t get hints or clues. I had to tell him the other day what a common object was. He’s the best man I’ve met and I do love him. I just can’t deal with it sometimes when he acts like a child. I know it’s not his fault. He’s truly beautiful. I think this makes me shallow, but I long for adult conversation and sometimes intimacy. He just doesn’t know how. He tries, and that’s one of the reasons I love him.
Tonight I am crying myself to sleep because of a video about a kid’s dad who was supposed to go on a trip with him but left. My dad did that a lot too. Why can’t I tell anyone about my dad? I envision my peers asking, “What’d your dad say?” And I envision myself responding with, “LOL, he didn’t respond.” However, inside my head, I’m like, “He died…”
I wish my mom remarried someone so I don’t have to worry anymore about having to lie about having a dad. I wish I had a dad so bad. Seeing my cousins have dads that are still here is slowly killing me inside. I always care about anyone who shows up in my life but I never show it. I care so much, but if they ever get out of my life, I get so worked up. I try and try to forget and avoid them until I’m finally able to do so, and then I totally stop talking to them.
I’m so confused when it comes to love. I’m in love with my best friend and it hurts. I’m not ready to be in a relationship but the rest of me wants them. I don’t know what to do. I love them so much. More than anything. I have for years. But I’m scared of losing my freedom.