Dear Neighbors: Please Move & Please Stop Trying To Sell Drugs To Us. Ugh.

Dear Neighbors,

Please move.  We’ve been here four years.  When we moved in only a middle-aged man and his son lived in that house.  The man’s still there, but now there are at least three other guys and two girls in and out of the house all day and night.  If it was just a bunch of people it wouldn’t really bother me, but the four small children that are out on the porch and in the yard form the time school gets out until well after dark bothers me.  I never see them go inside, they never have food or drinks, and they look very unhappy.  And please, stop trying to sell drugs to us.  It’s nice of you to think of us, but no, really, we are very sure we don’t need anything you have to offer.  And so is my ex-husband who happened to be visiting our son and playing with him in the yard.  Really?  Just don’t come over please.  And no, nothing in our garage is or ever will be for sale.  Especially the lawnmower, and on that note, for the tenth time, no I will not pay you to mow our lawn.  We are on a budget, and as you have seen, we have our own lawnmower.  Thank you.

image- Mike Babiarz