A Toxic Love: My Heartbreaking Fall for Him

This started as a friendship about two years ago. I even remember the first day I met him in his office. He was in uniform, gorgeous, and the second we looked at each other we already knew it was over. You know that little smirk you get when you know you shouldn’t be thinking about what you’re thinking?  Well, we both had it that day. For some reason I felt like I already knew him.  I’ve done this before. Fall in love, find out he has a girlfriend, stay even though it hurts, and then finally walk away.  Like I said, I’ve done this before. I thought he was different. Maybe I just wanted this time to be different. I broke up with my significant other and he still held on to his. Yet he couldn’t let go of me. I was here and she was there in California.  Then I finally realized he wouldn’t let go of her. Don’t tell me you’re stuck in the middle, because you’re not!  You have a choice!  You obviously made it.  I felt so not worth it for him. I feel so not worth it now. It’s crazy. Sometimes you can have everything going for you in life (career, finances, school), and yet still be sad and lost because of a broken heart.